I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
His hands were made for my vagina.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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