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Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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