His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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