I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
