if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
