this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize