If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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