are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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