All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
