I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize