so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
