He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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