Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Sorry my hands just texted you
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize