It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
