Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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