At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
