The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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