Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
