I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
