He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
