His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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