it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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