Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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