He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize