i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I need water and some morals
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
