Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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