Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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