ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
