Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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