I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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