I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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