i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
