Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize