I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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