The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
