I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
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