Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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