hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
