was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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