As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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