i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
