Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
