Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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