I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
