Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
