Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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