I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
