One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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