My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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