were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
