I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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