This girl is more easily done than said...
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I currently don't understand fingers.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
